Catfished... new year; new heartache

TO BAS (AKA ERICK) & VAL:

I want you to think about the fact that I sacrificed my own love in you so you could find the love you were badly in need of. I gave you what you wanted. I helped you find love when I was in need of finding it myself. I don't need your hate. I needed your support in finding myself. To that; I thank you because you held that much. The end is sweet isn't it?

Since day one, lies have speculated most of our years. I have known you (or the person you've created from time to time) for 8 years. The pain that I feel from this is unlike any other pain I've felt in a long time. Thank you for destroying any hope I had in anyone. Think of that whenever you go about treating someone like crap at the expense of who you 'love' and care for.

Upon a conversation with Val this evening, it's clear that he made this happen. I get it. Jealousy, posh behavior, and the occasional fake lines all seem to be the trend for European men; and yes.. I will generalize... You feared bringing out the bitter side in me but I'm there once again and this time; I'm keeping my heart locked from people that DO NOT deserve even an ounce of the joy and kindness that I can bring upon someone.

 I'm DONE with the both of you. You both deserve the same that you've given to me.

I thank you however for the gifts and memories; they count for something in light of this. I learned a lot about myself during all of this. I learned how to let go quicker and how to get over the pain better but this is something that will stick with me for awhile. I appreciate the candor. Really, I do.

You are both cruel people. I hope who ever you decide to do your foolish games with will be smarter than I was. To hurt, to lose, and to bruise a heart in the way that you have. It's unforgivable.

All you have done is hurt me in this way. I can't; I won't; I don't have to.

Goodbye on both of you.

May God bring to you what you've brought unto me. May you feel the pain that you've given me. May you relish in the decisions that you will not conquer. May you find silence in your call for betterment.

In the end; I'm thankful because this is a new beginning. This is a chance to break these chains that have held me back. To finally get what I deserve to have; love that is unmatched to the shameful behavior displayed by people of your stature.

You see, I can be cruel too. I can be dark, bitter, undone, and full of rage but I choose to let go. I let go of the lies you gave. I let go of the detriment you release. I let go of the anguish you desire. I let go of YOU.


TO MY READERS:

This will be my last blog post here for some time. I will be taking a brief break from posting for some time to focus on new projects that I am currently starting.

I'm looking into better platforms for voicing myself on the things that truly matter to me most. Tumblr, and among other platforms are in consideration but when I know for sure where my new home will be; I will post the information here after which this blog will be going private to prevent any new readers from accessing this blog.

I understand that this is an inconvenience but I promise you; it will be worth it.

God bless you all <3

PS: Here's a picture of the people who catfished me for 8 years




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