April 30, 2013

I don't know who he is

But I would love to kiss him :)

Oh beautiful guy, make my heart sizzle

April 29, 2013

April 28, 2013

K.I. Theory: Arms For Legs

A rather impressive ensemble; this album. It's among the many newer additions to my current library which consists of almost nothing mainstream or meaningless pop tracks from the likes of Hollywood starlets and drama queens. As part of the ever so long changes that are coming ahead for my style, personality, and the age of growing older; my music reflects a pastime of myself. Many of the songs I have are very uniquely artistic or hold a stronghold with lyric formation and note timing. 

This album offers up 7 songs to the hipster formed out there. You could say I'm a hipster or changing into one but I've always had a unique want to be beyond everyone else's setup. I like being different because it helps me see how special I really am as a human being. I know that I'm quite a great person from my music and my style. Both took years to understand and to invent to what I really feel. I'm almost there. 

This album is listed as Dance/Electronic but it's really a mixture of Alternative Rock and Electronic. It's reminiscent of some of the early 90s bands that wowed me back in the day. I enjoy it. Songs like "Strongman" (which inherently is instrumental) is quite a nice track. It bring the ambiance of instrumentals to the forefront and makes you space out into the sound. A must for any great album like this one. Another track that really holds bars beyond some of the songs I've heard lately is the track "Here To Stay" which is very teenage suedo-punk and really catches the spirit of catching the punk-esque sound with a mix of a 'Foster The People' like electronic ensemble that screams hipster bliss. 

I'd recommend this album to those that enjoyed 'Foster The People' with their debut album that came out a couple years ago. Really though, the album has an affinity for those who also enjoy 'The Foo Fighters' and some of the softer sides of 'Band Of Horses' which have a unique and lovely sound all in their own right.

As always, I'm changing because I am reaching my peak again. The time when I need to revert and reinvent so I won't become bored or lose myself as I did for some time. Part of the process is more than just music and fashion however, it will require an entire overhaul of my former; to let go and to rebirth a happier me. A truly honestly madly deeply different but neatly tucked neutral version. To go to a place I've yet to explore. 

Eventually; I'm getting my ears pierced; a first in all the years I've been alive. I've longed for it. I think it will look very sexy on me and help to blossom parts of my personality that some people have neglected to see in me or simply never noticed. I have a lot to accomplish; but may the sun rain down it's light for me. I will go far because I have faith. Faith will conquer it all because believing conquers all. This is apparent in everything.  Love, sex, addictions, if you believe in it; it can conquer all. So don't stop believin' baby. The time is now.

April 25, 2013

M83 - Skin of the Night

This song is beautifully made. I love the euphoria of it. It's a haunting yet stagnant beauty of notes and lyric formations. If you love Goldfrapp and Shiny Toy Guns... you'll fall in love with M83... <3

April 24, 2013

Shying away

So for years, I felt like mainstream music needed a change. It needed an evolution to which nothing has proven able since pre-2000 musical ventures.

Today, I'm going through my entire music library on my Google Play account and removing all the gunk from it. I have a high quality collection of great tunes so far; but some are just too out of sync with what I'm feeling these days.

Spring cleaning comes but one time a year, so I shall clean my music up a bit to fit with the more mature age of 23. Rather than listening to music that makes me feel like I'm 15 again. It's time for an upgrade anyway.

Music sets me free. It's also something I value; so I need to go through my processes of change every now and again. Like David Bowie and those in his boudoir of musical ventures; I am changing again and this time, it's more to fit with my musical development and creative adjustment.

So light folk, dreamy easy listening, jazzy electronic, and punk infusion rock, take me in and make me your child. Glam me with the lips of lyric and the touch of guitar vibrations. I'm all yours baby.

April 19, 2013

So I'm an abomination?

Come at me like a gun
Ridicule my faults forgetting your dumb
Ugly attitude and shady eyes
Your nothing less than lies
Fuck you and your little kid
I spit this shit like new trends
Cause a hater is less than
When you bitch about man
Look in that shiny glass
Before someone kicks your ass
You ain't got no class
Get on with that shitty fad
Bitch you need to step back

April 17, 2013

I think I want to burst with you?

Yes ma'am baby. I think I do a lot.


So the ending came

And then there was no more Buffy The Vampire Slayer and I was pretty sad to see it end but happy with the ending. Spike was super sexy though. I mean, Angel is cute and all but Spike really had it and that bod of his... ugh what a hottie...

So now it's time to move on to the sequel show; Angel which follows Angel and Cordelia and some new guy. In a way; it's like a new version of Buffy The Vampire Slayer but this time with a smaller clan and a little more serious than before.

It doesn't replace Buffy though. I will miss her most. I mean I felt like she was a friend or even a sister when I watched her take down all the vampires and demons. Dawn was great too. Really, the one that I loved most was Willow and Xander. They were all great and made the show was it was; a classic of the 90s.

We shall see how Angel goes and hopefully I will find a little filling of the void with it. Great shows always end too soon but with Buffy The Vampire Slayer, it ended at a good moment but it felt rushed up until the point. Technically though; considering the comic has 8 series; the show could've lasted one more season but after that; it would've been difficult to build a new story to continue the journey.

Anyway, let me stop rambling on about a favorite show. When I'm not working; I'm watching shows and movies. I guess I'm kind of a movie/show buff. It's not a bad thing but if I ever get lucky again as to have a relationship; I will have to balance it out with either steamy hot sex often or a wonderful get together with friends from time to time.

Really though, men are too judgmental and complicate things that aren't complicated. That's why you're single baby. I'm single because well; I haven't settled in my own shoes yet. I still have a long way to go but I'll get there. Besides, I'm thinking that it's better I'm on my own than to put someone else through my struggles. No worries in the end.

Okay, okay, I seriously need to get off here now... ;)

April 16, 2013

Beauty Guide: Makeup for Men

I get complimented often times for how well I can do my own makeup. Most notably are my eyebrows and my eyes. Some of my friends and even a few strangers have asked me how I do it. How can a guy do makeup with a natural yet covered look?

Well, it's simple really; it's all in how you apply it. Here, I will list some helpful tips to do a quick and easy coverage makeup that won't make you look like you're wearing a pound of foundation on your face.

The easiest tools I use to combat cake and powder looks is the use of a good moisturizer and a very good primer as your base before applying any foundation at all.

Might suggestion is to use as little foundation as possible; this minimizes the appearance of cracks, wrinkles, and other ill occurrences that happen when wearing foundation. My best kept secret to smile lines is actually the use of Urban Decay's Eyeshadow Primer Potion Which will prevent any lines from forming and last all day unlike so many concealers and primers out there.

Here is a list of items I would recommend for the healthy and natural look:

1. Urban Decay Eyeshadow Primer Potion (for forehead lines and smile lines)

2. NYX 'Stay Matte, Not Flat' liquid foundation (provides full coverage)

3. Loreal Paris' Youth Code Day/Night Cream (use as your moisturizer)

4. Barbizon 'Brush On Brow' in #5 (for Dark Brown hair)

5. NYX Photo-Loving Primer (in both Green and Clear - Apply the Green primer first before anything else)

6. Loreal Paris' True Match LUMI Healthy Luminous Foundation in C3 Cool (Creamy Natural) [use as your base foundation]

7. Physicians Formula 'Talc-Free Matte Finishing Veil' (to set and finish the look)

8. Physicians Formula 'Mineral Correcting Concealer & Pink Highlighter' (for dark circles and eye brightening) - an excellent alternative to Benefit' Eye Brightening Pencil

9. Cherry Chapstick (for your lips; this will help add a little bit of color to the lips for a healthy and refreshed look)

10. Covergirl 'Lash Blast Length' very black mascara (do not apply more than three times per eye; the key for men is to accentuate; not cake the eyes with too much noticeability) - alternatively you can trade this mascara for a clear one. Go to a place like Sephora or ULTA.

11. Physicians Formula Mineral Wear 'Blushing Glow' (can be used for blush but I recommend a cream blush in a very light color depending on your skin tone; why cream? because cream will set in better and look more natural in the long run)

12. NYX Matte Blotting Paper (use this during the day to combat oily areas without having to reapply any foundation - though I recommend carrying a mineral veil or mineral foundation and lightly dusting it over your foundation when re-applying for that polished perfect look)

So, this is a long list and granted these are the products that I use for my natural look; there are thousands of variants out there that could be better for you.

Remember, all skin types are different so it's all in experimenting with what works for you. A great makeup line for men is actually 4VOO and you can check them out at if you'd like.

Now, the most important tip to give to you would be to 'pat' the foundation on. DO NOT rub in the concealer or the foundation. Especially around your eye area.

Your eyes are extremely sensitive and believe it or not; rubbing them can cause wrinkles and droopage later on down the road. You don't want that. So don't rub. EVER.

I hope this little guide helps you get an idea as to where to begin with hiding imperfections and giving yourself the refreshed and polished look. When it comes to foundations; always go for a full coverage foundation.

If you are trying to hide any facial hair; get a matte orange lipstick and dab it over those areas before applying your foundation. Rub the orange lipstick in and then apply your foundation to get the appearance of even smoother skin.

Orange is a great color for combating facial hair because most facial hair is tinted blue but appears black. You can also use the orange lipstick (lightly apply) on your dark circle and problem areas before applying concealer. This will help dramatically reduce the appearance of them considering most dark circles are purple and blue in color usually.

Give this a try and let me know how it works for you; I'd do a video but I suck at videos and well; I kind of don't have a camera for it anyway. If you need a better look into this; take a look at this video on YouTube:

and if this video tutorial doesn't help you much; simply Google it or ask a male model? You might be wondering where you can buy all the items I listed here from. A great place that I recommend would be a beauty supply chain like ULTA and the great thing about ULTA is you can get a free makeup consultation to help you decide on what products would work well for you. There is also Sephora if you happen to have one in the area versus and ULTA shop.

April 13, 2013

I ponder

If I look like male and female and yet I feel male, should I then be female?

Would I be happier as a half-breed?

A girl on top and a guy on the bottom.

Who am I now? Where must I go?

Does love find me in my new pathway to anew?

Do I fight the battle I fought for understanding again?

Would you still love me if you could?

April 12, 2013

Men (Poem)

Why do you stare as if to ponder of my touch?
Caressing your dire need to be known but distant and vile
You always think you are so special but you're nothing to my mind
I rarely notice you half the time

You only crave what you see and not what you hear
You only want a piece of me and then you're gone for years

As though to impress such history to burden a smile
Your snobby nature makes nothing worth while
Bitter and torn like the sheets you've abused
Never in a million memories did I picture you

I wait and wait for something kind in return
Deserving all the best but simmer of burns
Missing the universe that used to adore me
Now these beautiful faces just tend to ignore thee

So walk the line and settle in fate
You won't have the best I can create
For your hate is emotional but your love is dead
I'd do anything to erase these visions from my head

All you ever wanted, was a bed

Broke down car and a fridge

So tonight started out like any other night. I went to work and did my work thing (did an excellent job zoning and doing returns by the way), decided I wanted a mini fridge for my room because I get tired of my food getting ate and I like my own space for things. Plus, the fridge is getting overcrowded with every other bum in the house who leaves stinky leftovers and gross foods. I am certainly deserving of something nicer.

Well anyway, my dad surprises me with a greet and his boss driving in his BMW with my step brother in the backseat. Keep in mind it's a tiny car and I had to literally cram into it because there was virtually no space. I now realize I don't want a sports car; I need something more convenient and probable to an everyday work environment. I need lot's of space.

I was already on the phone with my awesome Leo friend, Stephanie; who works with me on an almost daily basis. She is absolutely the best; I could seriously replace all bad memories with just one person like her. The conversation was great but cut short because I realized that my fridge wouldn't fit in his tiny BMW. Damn you tiny BMW!

I was agitated, having not known such events happened; I would've never spent $150 on my new fridge for my otherwise already cluttered bedroom. Luckily, I'm not going to completely lose it just yet, Walmart has a great policy on returns and well; if I must, I can always get my money back if need be. I just hate surprises like that. I mean, isn't it more responsible to give me a heads up before you drive up with a stranger I've never met before? I think so at least.

I thought I embarrassed my dad in front of his boss from work. My dad says I didn't but still, it's always strange to meet the man that tells my dad what to do. I mean, this guy is the backbone of the business my dad is part of. So it's kind of a big deal. Yet, he didn't intimidate me any but I was very polite and professional about the experience. I mean, the last thing I need is to embarrass my dad and then he gets fired over it. I would not be satisfied by that.

The good thing is, I looked great (or at least I thought so) and he seemed nice for the most part. Considering the situation and all. No one bothered calling me on the way however, to let me know that the car had broke down in the parking lot of my dad's workplace and that is what annoyed and pissed me off. I've even offered to take my own personal money that I bust ass for; to offer a cell phone for my dad so he can keep me in the loop when I need to know important things like this.

I honestly sound like a bitch probably and believe me; I am one but can you blame me? Wouldn't you be upset if you were expecting the normal routine, only to find that it had worsen without your knowledge of any kind of "Oh, hi, I just wanted to let you know that the car is broke I'll be late picking you up" and "I'm sorry I was late, but we had issues with the car" one told me, until I got home...

And that my friend's is the explanation of a pet peeve of mine. When information is withheld from me that could either benefit the current situation or help me to be prepared in a more orderly fashion. I guess I can learn from this in a sense. Don't always get what you want because you might have to wait longer to get it.

Ah, life.

UPDATE: Car is fixed and my fridge is soon to be in my cluttered room :) yay life!

April 10, 2013

They say things they don't mean

Well, well, children have a smart way of being judgmental these days.

Apparently a little African American kid thought I was a really ugly boy.

So much so, that he announced it to his mother as they strolled on by.

I get that he's little and doesn't know the pretext to words and all but it's sad when a mother just lets that slip without saying something to her child or acknowledging that it could hurt someone's feelings.

We live in a shallow world...I am not ugly...and if I am to be ugly, at least I am something in this jungle of harsh words...

April 7, 2013

Soon enough

It will be. I will be it. I will use it. It will use me.

Oh, Korg. How I love thee & I don't even own you yet.

Though it's a $400 keyboard/synthesizer; a dream is never too much to convey.